雅思寫作雖說由4個評分項決定，但之前文章中就說過，不論是從官方的反饋還是小編自己10多年的教學(xué)經(jīng)驗來看，TR(Task Response)是考生失分最多的點。

以7分段為例，TR主要包含三個方面：

1. addresses all parts of the task

2. presents a clear position throughout the response 

3. presents, extends and supports main ideas

3個細則中，以第三點中的 extends and supports main ideas最難，這也是大多數(shù)6/6.5分考生無法上7的最大原因。‍

高分的文章需要對觀點進行充分的論證展開(well-developed),什么是well-developed? 嚴格來說論證是否充分是比較主觀的，偏向個人的理解。但是雅思考試作為標準化測試，必須給出一些客觀的準則，以保證可操作性和打分的可重復(fù)性。‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍

今天以劍17和劍15的兩個題目為例為大家談?wù)剝蓚€準則(只談兩個)：‍

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development. (C17, Band 6, 反面例子)

提示：西方人認為西醫(yī)才是正統(tǒng)的醫(yī)學(xué)方法，其他的方法比如草藥，針灸，推拿等等都屬于替代性療法(alternative medicines and treatments)。‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍

In some countries, owing a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation.（C15， Band 7， 正面例子）


準則一：論證要符合邏輯聽起來感覺像廢話，但做到還真不容易。劍17的6分文章有一個觀點是論述alternative medicines的缺點：The first disadvantage of alternative medicines is that nobody knows how this treatment affect a person’s health. There are cases when using different herbals caused allergic reaction and some people died.

考生的觀點是沒有人知道這種治療的效果，后面的解釋是有一些人出現(xiàn)了過敏反應(yīng)和死亡。這里的問題是，難道usual doctor所代表的傳統(tǒng)醫(yī)學(xué)(西醫(yī))就不會出現(xiàn)過敏和死亡嗎？當然不是。這個論證不具有唯一性或獨特性，所以并不合理。我覺得好的論證可以是下面這樣。
The first disadvantage of alternative medicines is that nobody knows how this treatment affect a person’s health. Most alternative treatments are backed not by scientific evidence but by the experience of practitioners. Therefore, treatments are not subject to the same standards of safety and efficacy, so the results may not be as reliable as those from traditional medicines.

接下來有一個觀點論述alternative medicines的優(yōu)點：
One advantage is that alternative medicines are usually much cheaper than usual treatment as you do not have to go to a pharmacy and buy expensive drugs.

當我看到便宜的時候我是有疑問的。去年我家老大得了鼻炎，采用了西醫(yī)和推拿(替代性療法)治療，推拿可并不便宜！當然，如果考生能進行合理的論證展開說服我也行，但是后面說便宜的原因是因為不用買昂貴的藥。這個就顯得考慮不周了，在替代性療法中(比如推拿，氣功等)，治療本身可是要花錢的。

接下來是另一個關(guān)于alternative medicine優(yōu)點的論述:‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍
Alternative medicines do not cause environmental problems such as air pollution or gas waste. Many pharmaceutical plants use chemicals which have harmful effects on the environment.

考生給出觀點alternative medicines不造成環(huán)境問題。后面的解釋是制藥廠(這里指西醫(yī))要用傷害環(huán)境的化學(xué)物質(zhì)。又是嚴重的邏輯問題。這里是要論述A的好，而同學(xué)寫的B的不好。B不好怎么就能證明A好呢？比如我讓同學(xué)證明某老師很帥，他說因為X老師很丑。

正確的論證應(yīng)該是直接論述A，如下面這樣:‍‍‍‍‍‍
Alternative medicines may be more environmentally friendly. This is because some herbal remedies and dietary supplements may be made from natural ingredients and may not require as much processing as traditional medicines. Additionally, some alternative therapies, such as acupuncture or massage therapy, may not require the use of any medications at all.

在雅思寫作團教學(xué)中，我一直強調(diào)雅思不是邏輯能力測試，它不要專業(yè)，但是合理是必須的。

‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍

準則二：充分的論證需要有細節(jié)‍‍‍‍‍‍

這里有一個重要的概念：細節(jié)思維。這里不展開講這個知識，給大家提一個重要的小技巧：多寫并列結(jié)構(gòu)。無論是道理論證，還是舉例論證，多寫并列結(jié)構(gòu)。‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍

比如劍15的7分文章，考生寫租房會有各種各樣的stressors, 至少寫兩個stressor.‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍

If you are renting an apartment, there might be a lot of stressors in your life. A scratched wall can cause you a major headache, because the wall was not yours (第一個). The bedroom you are currently sleeping in might not be available as long as you hope, things happen in life and maybe the next landlord won’t want to have you as a tenant  (第二個).
又比如考生講租房的一個優(yōu)點，經(jīng)濟上是一個relief.

‍‍‍‍‍‍
In other perspective, not owning your home could be a relief when it comes to your finance. (1) As a renter your won’t have to pay mortgage, take loans or spend an awful lot of money on buying the property. (2)You wouldn’t have to worry about the house market crashing or a natural disaster destroying your expensive home. 1和 2兩句構(gòu)成并列結(jié)構(gòu)，每一個句子內(nèi)部又有多個小的并列結(jié)構(gòu)。‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍

剛剛給大家看的對考生文章的改進, 我自己在寫的時候也用了大量的并列結(jié)構(gòu)來增加內(nèi)容的豐富程度。‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍‍Alternative medicines may be more environmentally friendly. (1)This is because some herbal remedies and dietary supplements may be made from natural ingredients and may not require as much processing as traditional medicines. (2) Additionally, some alternative therapies, such as acupuncture or massage therapy, may not require the use of any medications at all.
請記?。翰⒘薪Y(jié)構(gòu)是提升文章內(nèi)容豐富度的重要方法。

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